John Kerry's "Easy Rider" Imitation

[Reprinted from NewsMax.com]


Responding to criticism that he had a laundry list of demands when he stayed in luxury hotels on the campaign trail, Sen. John Kerry said yesterday that he recently took a trip where he slept every night in his truck - accompanied only by his motorcycle, a friend and his butler, "Marvin."

Asked about the trip by radio host Don Imus, Kerry explained: "Marvin and Teddy [and myself] . . . We had the best damned time, I'll tell you."

"It was wonderful," the top Democrat declared. "We didn't stay anywhere. We actually drove all night. We slept in the truck. We cruised through, you know, a couple of little pit stops early in the morning. It couldn't have been nicer."

Kerry insisted that he and his butler were really roughing it, painting a picture right out of the hippie rebel movie, "Easy Rider."

"We didn't have any pillows. I'll tell ya, man. It was really funny cause I blew into some little gas station around midnight or two in the morning, whenever it was, and some guy would do a double take and look at ya. They just couldn't figure out what I was doing there at that hour of the morning.

"I couldn't figure it out [either]," the born-to-be-wild senator added.

Kerry didn't explain who "Teddy" was - or why, if he wanted to rough it, he brought his manservant, Marvin Nicholson, along for the ride.

In 2004, Mr. Nicholson detailed some of his responsibilities to the New York Times, which began its report by noting: "Mr. Kerry is comfortable being catered to."

"When he wants that peanut butter and jelly sandwich, I'm ready," Marvin explained.

Among the items Nicholson carries at all times for the rough and ready Democrat: Swedish hand cream, Scope mouthwash, Handiwipes, two packs of Band-Aids, Tylenol, Advil, Advil Liquid Gels, Advil Sinus pills, a sewing kit, a can of diet milkshake [Kerry prefers strawberry], a tube of Blistex and a myriad of other accouterments.

The Times noted that Kerry, husband of billionairess Teresa Heinz, pays his trusty manservant a mere $45,000 annually.

[Note: And to think: This phony-baloney gigolo got 48 percent of the popular vote for president in 2004!]